LSG - Anti-Lard Alliance Update Post

Six months ago I joined a group on Ravelry dedicated to weight loss. The first post was about measurements and goals, the subsequent ones about progress or lack of it.

As I was writing a six-month update today, it occurred to me that it may be interesting for you to see the goals I had and which ones have I achieved.

The original goals are in italics.

Stats now
Height: 167cm/5'6"
Age: 36
Kids: 0
Cats: 2

Starting weight: 86kg/190#
Current weight: 67kg/148#
Target weight: 66kg/145#

Lost in 6 months: 4kg/8#
Total weight loss: 19kg/42#

4 kilos over 6 months seems not to be much, considering that it's possible to lose that amount in one month. But, and it's a big but, I'm in it for life. I don't want crash diets, pills or surgery. Finding out what works or does not work for my particular body is what it's all about.

I want to be able to eat what I will, when I will and how much I will without gaining weight. Therefore I need to train myself to eat less, healthier, more nutritious food. Have take out or restaurant food as a rare treat instead of daily occurrence. I'm not done with the training, the adjustments and experiments, but I'm nearly there.

I think it is more important to eat sensibly than to diet, eat organic as much as possible instead of "detox" and cook most of your meals from scratch yourself than to rely on take-out or eat out. So what if it takes a long time to get to my goal? I'll get there and stay there.

Short-term goal: to get to the target weight, wear size 40 trousers.

Not there yet, one kilo / 2.5 lbs to go. I’m not size 40 yet either.

Long-term goal: maintain the target weight through exercise, gain some muscle.

I hate exercise.

The food part of the plan: portion control, portion control, portion control. I have no problems choosing healthy food (carrot sticks, yum!), but I have a problem eating too much.

No problems here. I can't physically consume as much as I used to. Success!

The exercise part of the plan: I will begin with the Ill Fit program today and work up to 30 minutes a day 4 days a week by Aug 21. Then I will continue with that for 14 weeks. Hopefully by the end of 14 weeks I've developed a habit of exercising and won't hate it so much.

I hate exercise! Total fail. I could be slimmer, go down a size simply by weight training, but it bores me to death. I may forever stay a size 42, but life is too short to be bored.

The mental part of the plan: watch like a hawk for signs of emotional eating/depression. Remind myself that exercise won't kill me even if the heart rate goes beyond 140. Never, ever again compete with a 6'6" obese bloke who can eat more. I know I can, I don't need to prove anything to anyone.

No worries here either. Last time I wanted to buy a pizza because I was stressed and in a hurry, I bought ingredients for tuna salad instead. I really hate exercise. Last time someone tried to pressure me to eat more than I felt like, I refused without a scrap of guilt. Success (mostly) here too.

P.S. My inner reaction to seeing '19 kilos lost' is: OMG! 19! 19!!!! O.O

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5-year Anniversary Feature, January

At the last Wednesday of the month I'll post what I was up to that month for the past five years. I hope you enjoy the trip down the memory lane.

2004, Tallinn

Preparing for the move to Stockholm and my PC crashed.

2005, Stockholm

A new kitten, and some knitting.

2006, Dublin

Moving to a house with SCA friends.

2007, Dublin

Trying to lose weight. Not very successfully, I must add.

2008, Stockholm

Fixing up the flat.

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mad shit is gettin on ma nurves

Something hilarious: mad shit is gettin on ma nurves.

P.S. The above in no way reflects the state of my "nurves".

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Belated Blogiversary

Last December was so busy that I completely forgot to celebrate my 5-year blogiversary. Five years. FIVE!

A lot has happened during those years, here are a few major events:

2004 — a move to Stockholm.

2005 — a move to Dublin.

2006 — lots of SCA.

2007 — the move back to Stockholm, the breakup and finding my own place.

2008 — settling in.

These events span more than one post, hence no links.

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Simon's Sister's Dog

More funnies from Simon on YouTube, this time with serious undertone.

If you haven't seen them before, check out his previous clips, 'Cat Man Do', 'Let Me In' and 'TV Dinner'.

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On Diets and My Weight History

I talk about my weight quite often, mostly reporting progress because, well, reporting that noting happened is boring and setbacks are depressing. Jorun asked did I follow a diet and I thought that perhaps it would be interesting to read about what worked for me.

First, some background. I had always been skinny, I was skinny when I was a child, a teen and a young adult. I started filling in in my (very) late 20's and was at my perfect weight at 29-31. After meeting R, and moving in with him I went past "filling in" to gaining weight rapidly reaching obesity at 86 kilos in the end.

The trouble was that after being skinny all my life, I thought I was fat at 59 kilos and beyond salvage at 60. In reality, I had the best body I could ever have at 63 kilos — just the right amount of curves in right places. No one kicked any sense into me because I didn't really tell anyone what I thought saw in the mirror.

So when I continued to gain weight while being with R, I'd stopped caring and let go completely. See, I was so fat so it didn't really matter if I gained some more. Stupid, stupid, STUPID! R didn't care either and never tried to stop me eating myself to death.

Fast forward to Ireland and a house mate who inspired all of us to go to gym. I weighed myself first time in years and became even more depressed to see 82 kilos on the scales. Looking in the mirror I realised that all those years ago, when I'd had looked my best, I'd added 20 kilos to my mirror image. I looked at 82 kilos exactly as I'd imagined myself to look at 62. Crazy, huh?

Having gotten no support at all from R in my effort to lose those extra 20 kilos, I quit it all and continued to substitute food for the love and caring I did not get from him. As a consequence I weighed 86 kilos when he broke up with me.

I waddled when I walked and a kid on the street yelled 'fatty' at me. I felt fat, old and ugly. Of these three there was only one thing I could change, my weight. I decided to stop being fat.

At the company kick-off in September 2007 I saw exactly how much I'd been over eating. I started to reduce my portions and changed what I ate. I went with my gut feeling, eating what I liked, experimenting with food, and buying organic produce or ingredients.

The result is that I've lost 18 kilos and I eat lots of legumes, fibre-rich grains, dairy, and vegetables, with a little meat now and then. I buy organic whenever the option is there.

I had tried a few diets, but a diet is someone else's rules for someone else's body, not mine. In the end what worked was to reduce the portions to a sensible size and listen to my body, find out what kind of fuel my body needs.

It helps that I do not have a sweet tooth and have no cravings whatsoever for cake, soda, chocolate, biscuits or candy. My weakness was ice cream. Last year I made a concious effort not to buy it for several months. Of course, I didn't last all 14 weeks without ice cream, but I don't have have some in the freezer at all times any more either.

I'm not at my goal weight yet, nor am I done with adjusting what and how much I eat. I do not look as good as I looked when I passed the 68 kilo mark the first time, nor will I ever weigh 60 kilos again. There's much more work to be done to reach my goal and to improve the muscle tone. However, I am no longer fat, old, and ugly; and that is the most important bit.

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New Year

The vacation is over, I'm back at work today. I'd grown so used to my Mac, that it took a moment to remember Windows controls and get used to this clunky keyboard.

The Christmas in Tallinn was lovely, we even had a thin layer of show on the ground. Finally! White(ish) Christmas after so many years. It was good to spend time with family and take a look at Tallinn. It has changed so much I hardly recognise it any longer.

I'd asked for money to buy clothes with for Christmas and went shopping in Tallinn. I found two T-shirts that I liked, but my style didn't seem to exist in Tallinn, so I'll go shopping for my Christmas presents here in Stockholm. There is a store called Blue Fox that has exactly the style I'm after, I'm sure I can find something there.

I gave my old laptop to my parents so we can Skype instead of using mobile phones to talk. Neither of my parents have used a PC before and Mum had a little trouble at first, but she's a fast learner and she's doing fine now.

Their internet connection is a bit off, so that the laptop can't connect automatically to the net when it's turned on. I did a little troubleshooting and asked Mum to call a tech from their ISP to come and look at the set up. Then I left her commands to type in to force the laptop to fetch the dynamic IP address. That makes things work until the connection drops and the whole process must be repeated.

The tech came by and switched the modem last week, but didn't test it (WTF?! How can you not test the solution to a problem you're solving?) and that didn't help. So it's either the ISP soft-/hardware that's hinky or the laptop has lost it's ability to get and keep a network connection going. Or the server and laptop just don't like each other. I've seen weirder stuff happen during my days in tech support. In any case, the ISP tech needs to take a look at the problem again.

I mostly played WoW during my vacation, role played some and went to a New Year's party. The party was 80s theme party, I went as a punk and had loads of fun. Everyone had made an effort to dress up and it was interesting to see which aspect of the 80s they chose to represent.

My weight was 68 kilos on the dot last Friday, nothing exiting to report there. I'd gained a kilo over the Christmas week, but fluctuations like these are perfectly normal.

As planned, my main WoW toon is level 80. I've also been able to participate in a couple of raids with her, no heroic dungeons yet. I also made a new toon (a paladin) to learn to tank eventually. I quite like to play a paladin (I'm not squishy any more!) and I like that I can choose to be a tank or a healer or a damage dealer in the end.

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